This is BD’s new tub. He thought it would spice things up a bit. Har. Har. Har.
Actually, we saw it at a garage sale. I wanted it for the house. Oh, BD, a cast iron tub for the upstairs bathroom? Be still my vintage heart. BD had other plans – a koi pond and keep your mitts off it, Curly. It sat for months on the side yard and the neighbors were like, “For krissssssakes, Fishers, keep your erectile dysfunction problems in the house. This ain’t some commercial.” To hell with them we said and left it out there until spring.
Last weekend the Cialis Tub got moved to its permanent location by the patio and isn’t she pretty? The fish will be ready for their new home once BD runs the pump awhile to clean it out. The power for the pump is coming from an outlet in the basement.
Like so…… BD, shouldn’t we do something about that window situation? When the raccoons discover your pond, they’re going to come in the house thru the basement window to dry off after their surf and swim. BD said I was crazy. He said animals don’t come in houses. He doesn’t watch Hoarders so he doesn’t know about the old lady who had a house full of chickens. And I mean chickens everywhere.
Once upon a time, BD and the Boy Child came home from a scouting campout with a snake. BD put it in a little aquarium with a screen on top. Shouldn’t you put something heavier on top of that so it doesn’t escape? Oh, Little Woman, he says, you slay me with your heebie jeebies.
Months later, I’m up and down the stairs on a Saturday morning doing laundry and BD is whistling and wandering around with a flashlight. I ask him what he’s looking for and he says, oh nothing, just looking. About the third time up the stairs. two neurons in my brain region make a love connection and that’s when I figured the whole thing out, looked at BD and said, “That fucking snake is missing, isn’t it?” (No italics and an F-bomb cuz I was really pissed.) It’s not missing he tells me, it’s lost and he goes back to whistling zippety-do-dah like it’s my, oh, my, a wonderful day with a snake on the loose.
Not to anyone’s surprise, the snake was never found which is why I try not to keep my butt on the toilet seat too long. BD says that’s why I’m uptight and constipated, but if it has grown to python size, I don’t want to be in a compromised position should it decide to check out our little Garden of Eden……….
………..because when that snake thinks the moment is right, plenty of trouble could be headed my way.