Mallie Bee has been slow to learn how to drive. It’s fine by me because teaching a Fisher how to drive is MY LEAST FAVORITE THING TO DO. However, she’s about to be a senior and needs to get crack-a-lackin. Her friend is taking a driver’s ed class which has lit a fire under her, so she’s been studying the driver’s handbook in order to get her permit.
At dinner she asked us to start quizzing her. I started with the easy stuff about two cars getting to a stop sign at the same time and who has the right-of-way. The one not yapping on a cell phone. When merging, should you slow down, speed up or maintain your speed? Correct answer: Maintain your speed, but I slow down due to crippling merge anxiety. Orange signs signify what? Two lanes are closed, nobody’s working and you’re sitting in the front row for the movie.
Then the Boy Child asked how you identify someone blind in a crosswalk. Hmmmm……thinking caps everyone. And he says “by their white neckerchief.” White neckerchief? I never heard of that. Oh yes, he says. It’s in the handbook. Seriously? Yes, old mom who hasn’t looked at the handbook in forty years, a white neckerchief means a blind person is crossing. Who the heck wears a neckerchief? Blind people, he says. How do they know which is the white one? Big Daddy weighed in on that one saying he’s pretty sure it’s a white cane and not a fashion accessory that identifies a blind person.
And the Boy Child thought it over and said oh yeah, maybe it is a white cane and not a white neckerchief after all. Miss Daisy looked at us like we have no idea what the hell we’re talking about and it’s no wonder she’s in no hurry to take her driving test.