It’s been a long summer around here with way too much ice cream. I said to Junior, “How about we all go out and get some exercise?”
I said, “Mullet, shmullet, put Sissy behind my behind and let’s get a move on.”
When we got home, The Big Daddy said, “Ya can’t wear that when you ride a bike. Ya have to wear spandex or you’ll end up getting the Monkey Butt.”
Oh, he’s a stickler when it comes to proper bicycle attire, so we loaded up the truck, trucks and went to the Wal-Marts.
It wasn’t until we got to the mouthwash aisle of the Wal-Marts that I noticed those damn shorts of his. I got so mad at him I said, “Didn’t I tell ya not to be wearing white after Labor Day?” Sheesh, I thought everybody knew that fashion rule.
Them kids was taking forever picking out snacks, and then my bad knee gots to acting up. I said, “Let’s get this show on the road or I’m gonna fall down right here in the Funyuns aisle.” Junior heard me and sure enough, he comes back a few minutes later with one of them Wal-Mart Jazzys.
Finally, we finished our shopping and headed home. I just wanted to take a load off, but I needed to water the garden, what with all the heat and dry.
I was so tired from that long day, I conked out, and who should show up in my dreams, but him………
…………..and just when he was about to show me his cleats, these two appeared giving me the stinkeye like they was holier than thou.
