Long before Michelle Obama took on the epidemic of childhood obesity, The Big Daddy and I were doing our own program called Let’s Move. We are not as high profile as FLOTUS (and suddenly I have developed bingo arms) so nobody was aware of the program, but anyone can participate. Let’s have an overview, shall we?
Eight years ago, we moved Maggie into her first dorm room in August. It was on the 9th floor. In May, we moved her out.
In August, we moved Maggie into a different dorm. It was a suite with two other girls in the lower level. In May, we moved her out.
In August, we moved Maggie into a campus apartment complex in which she was an RA. We rented a U-Haul. It was on the 1st floor.
Two years later, we rented a U-Haul and moved Maggie out of that apartment and back home.
The following summer, Maggie moved out of the house and into an apartment in Kansas City. It was up several flights of stairs with no elevator. Guess who helped her move?
The summer after that we helped Maggie move into a new apartment on the 2nd floor with Nathan. We loaded our cars, they rented a U-Haul and we helped them move.
The summer after that they rented a small house and a U-Haul and we helped them move.
This week they will find out if the offer they made on a house will go through. They may be moving.
Four years ago, we moved Will into his first dorm room in August. It was on the 2nd floor. In May, we moved him out.
In August, we moved Will into a different dorm with a different roommate on the 2nd floor. In May, we moved him out.
In August, we rented a U-Haul and moved Will into an apartment on the 2nd floor.
Two years later, we will rent a U-Haul (Saturday if you want to help) and will be………..(you guessed it) moving Will back home.
Last August, we moved Mallory into her first dorm room. It was on the 3rd floor. In May, we moved her out.
In August, Mallory will move to a house that she is renting with three other girls. We will rent a U-Haul and help move her in. Wait until her Dad sees the stairs.
And what has happened to us over these past eight years, two different colleges and more apartments and dorm rooms than we can even remember? Are we more fit? No, we are not.
We are older and we have grown weary. We think the thousands of dollars we pay for college should include strapping young frat boys with pickups to take care of mattresses and microwaves. Instead it’s good ol’ Mom and Dad who drop ef bombs when we see flights of stairs and unpacked piles of shit. Oh sorry you guys…..ran out of boxes. The kids accuse us of being cranky and negative.
We are all of the above, but especially we are free laborers who get mail from AARP on a weekly basis. Something isn’t adding up here.
