Rim Shot

Saturday was moving day for Will.  It began the day before when he called and mentioned something about me reserving the U-Haul.  Me????  No.  Not me.  You.  You were supposed to do that.  Remember……..college graduate, adult, legal age, taking care of big kid stuff?  I said I’d pay for it but you were supposed to secure it.  We went back and forth about who said what for awhile, each of us raising our voice a little higher.  This wasn’t getting us anywhere.

He got online in hopes of finding a truck to rent on Memorial Day weekend.  Did you know more people move on that weekend than any other time of the year?  Neither did we.  After a few hours, he found one that was forty minutes away from us which wasn’t so bad because we pass that way en route to his campus.  The was-so-bad-part was that it had to be returned to that location and not at a U-Haul lot in Kansas City when we were done.

Knowing how irritated I was by the whole situation, Will had nearly everything ready and stacked in the parking lot of his apartment by the time we got there.  Loading was a piece of cake.  The truck was being shared with a friend whose parents live near us and her load-up went even quicker.

We made the two hour drive, unloaded her stuff and then came home to unload Will’s stuff.  Mark was backing the truck into the driveway and I got out to be the Monback.

Monback, monback, monback…………Whoa.  Whoa.  That’s good.

The Big Daddy Truck Driver was concerned about hitting the basketball goal so I was the guide.  And as I was Monbacking and watching the net, the roof of the truck was hitting the rim and bending the entire goal post.

Whoa, whoa, stop, I yelled as I pushed on the post to straighten it back up.  To no avail because it’s steel ya big dork.

Mallory was watching all of this unfold in front of her and hysterically laughing at me.  The Big Daddy was not amused.  He jumped out of the truck – yelling and flailing his arms and said, “The only job you have all day is to make sure I don’t hit the basketball goal and you’re standing there watching me hit the goddamn basketball goal.  What kind of Monback are you?”

Are you talking on a scale of 1 – 10 or like a school grade?  Are you even talking to me at all right now?

We no longer have a use for that basketball goal anyhow and so I said, “Why don’t you keep going and knock it all the way down?”

“Because this is a rental truck.  We can’t return it with a big dent on the top of it because you think we should do home improvements with a U-Haul.”

Oh yeah.  I forgot about that part.  And the rim. 

If your shots hook to the right then this is your basketball goal.

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