This Ain’t My First Rodeo

On Friday morning, we arrived on the Campus of Higher Learning and Mallie Bee’s new home.  Since this is my third time moving a freshman into a dorm room, I know what to expect.

We loaded the car the night before and it seemed to me that it was the smallest load we’d ever had.  From what I remember of Time #1 and Time #2, the car was packed, with barely enough room to cram in the student who was expected to arrive with all this stuff.  BD, don’t forget to leave space for the kid.

Move-in day, despite the best of intentions or planning by the higher-ups, is always a cluster and we spent 45 minutes creeping inch by inch to the dorm entrance.  Two lines to make it go faster?  Nope, and chatting it up with campus security during the process found him in agreement, “Ma’am, they don’t ask me my opinion, but I’ll be damned if that wouldn’t make a whole lot more sense.” 

Directly ahead of us was a family with a U-Haul.

A U-haul.

It took them twenty minutes to unload their rented trailer and Target must have met their daily sales goal every time they walked down the back-to-school aisle.  It just kept coming with a shoutout to Costco for the cases of bottled water, snacks, Gatorade and Propel, toilet paper and paper towels.  Then they took pictures of it.  The crammed U-Haul, the pile on the curb waiting for the volunteers to load it up, the student with the pile, Mom and student with the pile, brother and student with the pile, Auntie and Grandma and student with the pile, and then finally the empty U-Haul.

I. Was. Losing. It. 

When we finally reached The Promised Land we had our car unloaded and out of the way in five minutes.  Five.

We forgot a few things, but Mallie Bee’s a smart one and she’ll figure it out, make do, borrow or get it next time she’s home.

The broom and ironing board that the U-Haul family brought?  Will never be touched.

Video Friday

Today is move-in day for the Beester.  The Big Daddy is out of town and Nathan has oh so kindly offered to help us haul stuff up to her dorm room.  Last night, he and Maggie came by and he told us how he started bawling on his move-in day of freshman year and “it turned into a shit show.”

The new son-in-law is a perfect family fit.

One of the many things I will miss about not having the kids around is the videos and music they show me.  I feel like it keeps me hip to the youngins.  Except nobody hip would say that.

Mallie Bee told me about this one.  Blogworthy, she said, you’ll like it.

Yes, Beester,  I do love this video.  Now go off and meet new people, expand your mind and your world, call home once a week and make good choices.

Kerri

When my cousin, Kerri, was thirteen years old she passed away.  On Thanksgiving Day she was at my Mom and Dad’s house, and after our big turkey dinner I sat and talked to her.  She was much younger than I was so we weren’t especially close but I remember that talk.

The next day she went into cardiac arrest and was airlifted to Childrens’ Memorial in Chicago.  She remained there until her death in February.  At one point, the doctors told her parents that the best they could do was manage her symptoms as they had no idea what was causing her to continually go into cardiac arrest.

That was when anorexia was just becoming known.  She was teeny tiny for her age so they sent in a psychiatrist to talk to her.  She would have no part of it and would turn her head away from the doctor when she would come in to discuss it.  From the doctor’s viewpoint, this only confirmed that she had been starving herself to death.

An autopsy revealed that she had Freidrich’s Itaxia which attacks and weakens the muscles around the heart.  Her funeral was so, so sad and when it was over my siblings and I all came back to my parents house.  Mom and Dad went into their bedroom and closed the door.  They had been incredibly strong for my aunt and uncle through the months of Kerri’s illness and death and not once had I seen them cry.

All these years later, I think they came home from that cemetery, closed the door and sobbed.  My dad emerged awhile later and said to all of us sitting at the table, “I don’t ever want to hear one of you kids go to a funeral and tell someone to call if they need anything.  Somebody they loved just died.  Their life has been turned upside down and it’s not up to them to pick up the phone to ask for help.  It’s up to us to pay attention and figure out what they need.”   Then he walked back into the bedroom and shut the door. 

I never forgot those words of his.  He meant them and he expected his kids to heed them.

Kerri was so pretty.  Her eyes were big blue saucers and she had the longest lashes I’d ever seen.  Even in the hospital hooked up to a dozen machines, she smiled and whispered and her eyes shone.

She needed so much that was out of the grasp of all of us those many months in the ICU, but if I could have done anything for her it would have been to tell that psychiatrist to leave our girl alone.

Play It Again

I’ve posted this song once before.  I love it.  I could listen to it over and over and over.  Well, I have actually.  Mallie Bee introduced us to this song when she did her first solo to it, and all I can say about that is………….oh my, that girl dances with her whole heart.

The Teacher Girl is starting her school year off on very shaky ground……..over a hundred ELL kids and her only aide is on medical leave for cancer.  She’s had a long week complete with a shoe getting flung at her and somebody else I’ve come to admire has had a long year.

May it get better.

Soon.

Dr. Will

The Boy Child took a psychology class last semester and we have all been on the receiving end of his knowledge.  He told his sister that evidence shows that if you live with your significant other prior to marriage you are more likely to divorce.

She might have told him to mind his own beeswax.  Or buttwax.

This did not deter Dr. Will in matters of his family’s emotional health.

When he was taking me to pick up my car from the shop he said, “Big changes are coming for you and Dad, huh Mama?”   Yes, they are.

“How do you feel about that?”  I don’t really know yet.

“Well, you should know that this is a period of upswing in your marriage.”  Really?

“Yeah, you have the good times when you’re first married, then the raising kids years that aren’t so good for your marriage.  Now with an empty nest you will be going back to the good times.”  The honeymoon years so to speak.

“Yep, that’s it.  Good times.  You and Dad.”  

Well, now………..that’s a dog that just might hunt.

God Save The Queen

We have been addicted to the Olympics.  We usually are, but this year especially so, and Kansas City is ranked #2 in the country for most watched viewers.  What better way to spend a couple of weeks than admiring athletes whose training and dedication combined with power, skill and speed exceed us in every way. 

We had a boy who lived on our block who was Will’s best friend.  His forearms were about half their normal size causing multiple problems especially with his hands.  Everything from unwrapping a popsicle to writing was difficult for him, but his parents raised him as if there was no difference between him and his brother.  They moved many years ago, and every now and then he will show up at our door and the house rejoices at a Kevin sighting.

When he was in 4th grade he had to fill out a get-to-know-you paper on the 1st day of school.  The person he’d most like to be when he grew up?  His friend, Will Fisher.  His teacher had Will the year before and called to tell me that in twenty years of passing that paper out, no kid had ever put another student’s name as an answer to that question.

They were the best of buds and ran the street like little hoodlums.  His parents taught him that nothing he wanted to do was off limits.  His friend taught him how to pee outside so precious play time during summer breaks and after school wasn’t wasted in the house. 

Here’s to overcoming the odds…………and getting by with a little help from our friends.

Keep Your Head Up

Sunday is the day The Boy Child packs up his summer and moves back to the bustling metropolis of Manhattan, Kansas.  The Little Apple, although it bears absolutely no resemblance to the big one.  He will be a senior and good Lord, that went fast.  His focus this year will be finishing with a bang, and hopefully work, talent and luck will get him a design job when he’s done.

Next Friday, Mallie Bee moves into her dorm to start pursuing her passion for dance full-time.  Based on her siblings before her, four years from now we will wonder again at how the years have flown.

On Saturday, Mark and I will start a different stage of our life without the daily presence of kids.  The tick of days has been slow through most of those years, and then we blinked and each of them were flinging themselves out the door in a burst of energy and excitement.

I am thrilled and thankful that they have the opportunity to go to college when equally talented and passionate kids do not through no fault of their own.  I tell my kids that all the time.  You have no idea how lucky you are.

But this house that was too small for so many years will feel rather empty without their smiling faces around.

We could all use a little of this as we adjust to the changes before us……………..

Especially me.

Kleptos

Being a retail girl for awhile now, I’ve seen plenty of shoplifting or evidence thereof.  One time when I was working, two women came in to shop for Christmas gifts.  I talked to them for a few minutes and thought I understood that they needed to stay within a reasonable budget.  I pointed out some popular items that were a good price and one of the women immediately went to a table of very expensive sweaters.  Those will run you a bit more, I said, about $300.00.  She looked at me and said, “Do you think I can’t afford these?”  I was so taken aback, so flustered and embarrassed that I had misunderstood her that I apologized and told my coworker I’d be in the back room for a minute.  As I was coming back those two were running out the door with $2000.00 worth of leather coats.

I was set up.  Masterfully.

My niece works for a large chain of women’s clothing that I bet you’ve been to many times.  They are ripped off constantly, including the shoplifters who try to return what they’ve stolen for cash.  Mom would be so proud, ladies.  She told story after story of blatant shoplifting that even after years of working retail stunned me.

Like the store I worked for when the leather coats were stolen, you cannot accuse, confront or chase after a shoplifter.  You don’t know if they have a gun is what the managers will tell you and nobody’s life is worth it.  And if you know they have all your leather coats you watch them run out the door. 

While I agree with that, the rest of us are paying to keep women who you wouldn’t guess in a million years of being shoplifters in some mighty fine threads.  As we’re handing over payment at the register for our stuff, they’re in the dressing room cutting off security tags and shoving the stuff they like into a tote bag.

I worked for a small clothing boutique for a couple of years until they closed.  Two teenagers came in and tried on some dresses and then left them in a heap on the dressing room floor.  When one of the salespeople went to clean it out, a $300.00 dress was missing and she grabbed her cell phone and went looking for them in the shopping center.  She spotted them in the drugstore and kept an eye on them while she called the police. 

When the cops showed up she had them take a look at their backpacks, and there was the shoplifted dress along with some makeup from the drugstore.  As the cops hauled them away she yelled after them to never come in her store again.

It wasn’t really HER store, but we all felt ownership for this place we loved to work, and were willing to put up a fight to keep people from walking out the door with whatever they want.

Syncronized

When Mallie Bee was just a wee one, her and her friend spent five summers doing synchronized swimming at the local pool.  For $90.00 you could get somebody to Wear. Your. Kid. Out. Every. Morning.  I knew where to spend my bucks.

That’s when I discovered how grueling a sport it is.  Practice every morning and it doesn’t matter the temperature.  Pointing the toes.  Treading water.  Holding your breath and then holding it some more.  Sucking in water and spitting it out.  And don’t forget to smile when you pop out of the water so people think it’s fun.

The grand finale of the season was The Big Show on a Sunday summer’s eve with lights, music, an announcer and a snack bar.  It’s a big deal here in Mayberry.

When it was her last year, we decided to indulge in some pre-show gin and tonics with our neighbors.  The Big Daddy had three, and by the time the show started it was all I could do to keep him from falling off his lawn chair.

After the final routine and thunderous applause from the crowd, there was usually some thank you speeches, but that year there was a commotion on the pool deck.  Oh dear, I think somebody got sick.  The Big Daddy tried to get up to see, but whoa Nellie, he was feeling those gin and tonics.  The Boy Child said, “I think it was Mal.  Yeah, Mom, I’m pretty sure she was the barfer.”    

No, no, it’s not her.  It can’t be her.  Of all these girls here, it cannot possibly be her.

He would not stop laughing and The Big Daddy sat in his lawn chair yammering about The Milky Way and I was steeeeressed.

When it was all over our little mermaid came and got us.  We congratulated her on a great show and she said, “Did you guys see me puke when I got out of the pool?”

Synchronized swimming may look pretty, but when The Hillbillies decide to come out and give it a try you’ve got yourself a shit show.

Big Money

You may have noticed there are some ads on my sidebar.  This is something I’ve gone back and forth on forever because I don’t really like how they look, but I would like to make some money doing this.  I was reading some tips from a very successful blogger and she said nobody read her blog until she had a posting that went viral.  Since she had AdSense she was able to make some decent money from all those hits, so I have heeded her advice.

When I posted my piece about Chick-Fil-A, what should come up on my ads but that damn chicken place.  Meh.  I spent all morning trying to figure out how to get it off and hence, there will not be any fast food ads pop up because they have been successfully blocked.  Sorry, Taco Bell, I still heart thee.

August is an expensive month, this year especially so, but now I can make a contribution to the cause.  Last month I made $9.57 which sure beats the $7.63 I made on profit sharing from my last job.   

Hello spirals.  And not the fancy ones, kids.