This is Beemer the Cat. He’s a wild child. He likes to roam the hood, killing chipmunks and scaring squirrels.
When he’s not doing that, he’s hanging out with his woman next door, Dora. He and Dora used to hate each other, and I don’t know when that changed, but now he goes to see her every day and they nap together on the screened in porch. Yeah, a “nap” is what the young people call it these days. Dora can push the back door open, so when they wake up, she lets her man into the house. They like to play in the bathtub. So did me and The Big Daddy until we got stuck one day. When Beemer gets bored, he comes home for awhile, eats some of his own food, takes a nap, kills a rodent, and then heads back over to Dora’s house.
I’ve never had a cat that wanted to be friends with another cat. First thing in the morning, he’s crying to get out the door and over to Dora’s house in a big, fat hurry. I look over in that yard and wonder what in the hell those two are up to, and they look back like mind your own business Gladys Kravitz.
Either there’s some crazy, wild cat sex going on every day or they’re talking about me. I’ll never know, but the one thing I’m sure of is that the day you spend two hours writing a story about cats is the day you realize you really need to get a life.